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Love
Love suffers long and is kind, Love does not envy Love does not parade itself Love is not puffed up Love does not behave rudely, it does not seek its own, it is not provoked, Love thinks no evil. Love does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth. Love, bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, and endure all things 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 Love overcomes a multitude of sins All around.
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i just cant hold back anymore
things have not been going right. everything was a burden to me. even now, it's still a burden to me. something's weighing on my bag, i just need to let go, somehow. the past few days. many things have happen.at first was about kah hui, i controlled my tears, than it was about the ex-co, it was so stressful. i controlled my trears. than today, went for co practice,learned the new song, than not fimiliar with it yet, than emilia and i got a scolding frm the conductor. she was so harsh. we were badly hurt by her, so bad that i almost cried but i controlled, later she beat my head. I CONTROLLED. THINKING BACK NOW, I WONDERED HOW I CONTROL later she told us to go out and practice with our senior, i so wanted to cry so much. so very much. let a few tears down and CONTROLLED. after we were realesed from cca, i cried. i lean on emilia's shoulder and cry. but as we were going down, i just have to control it all, as there were many people downstairs. took bus home. almost cry again, but controlled. when i reached home, at about 845, i cried, so so badly. than kee loke sms me, so asked him to call me. while we were talking, i was like crying, crying non stop. it's like when you cry when a close relative pass away. he could tell. he could tell i was crying. but i bluff him, i said i was ok, than. really cannot take it. told him to call me ltr, and i cried and i cried. cried non-stop. managed to stop crying for a while, so sms kee loke that he cam call me now, but when we were talking half way thru. i just couldnt take it anymore, told him to call me ltr again. and now. i'm still crying. releasing all the stress and burden. its 950 plus. i have like cried for an hour plus. ALL I NEED WAS A HUG when i saw you hugging kah hui, I KNEW I NEEDED THAT HUG SO MUCH. but in the end i did not get. I WISH THAT I'M NOT BORN INTO THIS WORLD. cant continue, i'm not gonna fight against my burden, my stress. letting it take over me, my life and my soul. |
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